{"product_id":"i-brake-for-longhorn-cowfish","title":"I Brake for Longhorn Cowfish","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"912\" data-end=\"948\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"914\" data-end=\"946\"\u003eI Brake for Longhorn Cowfish\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"950\" data-end=\"1016\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"953\" data-end=\"1014\"\u003eYour Car Just Became the Apex Predator of the Parking Lot\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1018\" data-end=\"1262\" class=\"\"\u003eListen, most people slap a “Baby on Board” bumper sticker on their Honda and call it a day. But not you. You’ve got \u003cstrong data-start=\"1134\" data-end=\"1143\"\u003etaste\u003c\/strong\u003e. You’ve got \u003cstrong data-start=\"1156\" data-end=\"1167\"\u003eswagger\u003c\/strong\u003e. You’ve got an uncontrollable love for the unsung hero of the sea: the \u003cstrong data-start=\"1239\" data-end=\"1259\"\u003elonghorn cowfish\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1264\" data-end=\"1420\" class=\"\"\u003eSo now, for every tailgating truck, nosy Prius, or confused child in the backseat behind you, you can proudly declare: \u003cstrong data-start=\"1383\" data-end=\"1418\"\u003e“I Brake for Longhorn Cowfish.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1422\" data-end=\"1469\" class=\"\"\u003eThis is not a joke. This is your whole brand.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1471\" data-end=\"1474\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1476\" data-end=\"1540\" class=\"\"\u003e🐮 What Even \u003cem data-start=\"1492\" data-end=\"1496\"\u003eIs\u003c\/em\u003e a Cowfish and Why Are You Braking for It?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1542\" data-end=\"1783\" class=\"\"\u003eA \u003cstrong data-start=\"1544\" data-end=\"1555\"\u003ecow fish\u003c\/strong\u003e is basically a boxfish with horns and a vengeance. It waddles through the ocean like a floating Lego brick with attitude. It looks confused and mildly threatening at the same time—just like you in a grocery store parking lot.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1785\" data-end=\"2057\" class=\"\"\u003eThis bumper sticker is an ode to that awkward, majestic, oddly-shaped marine beast. You brake for cowfish because you care. Because you’re built different. Because you once made unblinking eye contact with one at an aquarium and you’ve never been the same since.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2059\" data-end=\"2062\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2064\" data-end=\"2120\" class=\"\"\u003e🛠️ Specs That Slap Harder Than a Fish Out of Water\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2122\" data-end=\"2421\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2122\" data-end=\"2131\"\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e 8.5 inches wide x 2.5 inches tall – built for bumpers but fits laptops, coolers, fridges, and your neighbor’s mailbox (don’t do that)\u003cbr data-start=\"2265\" data-end=\"2268\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2268\" data-end=\"2281\"\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/strong\u003e Weatherproof, scratch-resistant vinyl – the good stuff\u003cbr data-start=\"2336\" data-end=\"2339\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2339\" data-end=\"2350\"\u003eFinish:\u003c\/strong\u003e Smooth semi-gloss that says “I moisturize… sometimes”\u003cbr data-start=\"2404\" data-end=\"2407\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2407\" data-end=\"2419\"\u003eOptions:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2422\" data-end=\"2603\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2422\" data-end=\"2453\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2424\" data-end=\"2453\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2424\" data-end=\"2436\"\u003eSticker:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sticks forever\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2454\" data-end=\"2501\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2456\" data-end=\"2501\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2456\" data-end=\"2476\"\u003eMagnet (20 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e Removable and reusable\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2502\" data-end=\"2603\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2504\" data-end=\"2603\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2504\" data-end=\"2532\"\u003eMagnet Upgrade (30 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e Thick enough to survive Arctic tundras or your uncle’s freezer truck\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2605\" data-end=\"2776\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2605\" data-end=\"2619\"\u003eLongevity:\u003c\/strong\u003e Built to last through rain, UV rays, power washes, and moral crises\u003cbr data-start=\"2687\" data-end=\"2690\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2690\" data-end=\"2703\"\u003ePrinting:\u003c\/strong\u003e Professionally printed by real humans in the U.S. – this ain’t AI fish\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2778\" data-end=\"2781\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2783\" data-end=\"2850\" class=\"\"\u003e🎯 Magnet vs. Sticker – Let’s Settle This Like Adults (Loudly)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2852\" data-end=\"2866\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2852\" data-end=\"2864\"\u003eSticker:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2867\" data-end=\"3003\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2867\" data-end=\"2905\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2869\" data-end=\"2905\" class=\"\"\u003ePermanent AF. Stick it and commit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2906\" data-end=\"3003\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2908\" data-end=\"3003\" class=\"\"\u003eGreat for water bottles, laptops, bumpers, coolers, or helmets (don’t wear it while driving).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3005\" data-end=\"3027\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3005\" data-end=\"3025\"\u003eMagnet (20 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3028\" data-end=\"3149\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3028\" data-end=\"3090\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3030\" data-end=\"3090\" class=\"\"\u003eRepositionable. Change your mind as often as your hobbies.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3091\" data-end=\"3149\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3093\" data-end=\"3149\" class=\"\"\u003eSticks to anything magnetic (except your dating life).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3151\" data-end=\"3173\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3151\" data-end=\"3171\"\u003eMagnet (30 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3174\" data-end=\"3324\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3174\" data-end=\"3257\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3176\" data-end=\"3257\" class=\"\"\u003eHeavy-duty. Ideal for cold places where normal magnets curl like cooked shrimp.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3258\" data-end=\"3324\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3260\" data-end=\"3324\" class=\"\"\u003eOptional upgrade at checkout because your ride deserves armor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3326\" data-end=\"3553\" class=\"\"\u003eNot sure if your bumper is magnetic? Here’s a fun test: slap a fridge magnet on it. If it sticks, congratulations. If it falls off, try your trunk, doors, or side panels instead. Or just get the sticker and commit to the bit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3555\" data-end=\"3558\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3560\" data-end=\"3621\" class=\"\"\u003e🌊 Why This Cowfish Bumper Sticker Will Change Your Life\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3623\" data-end=\"4093\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3623\" data-end=\"3763\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3625\" data-end=\"3763\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3625\" data-end=\"3665\"\u003eYou’ll be asked about it constantly.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"3665\" data-end=\"3668\"\u003eStrangers will stare. Coworkers will Google. Someone at a gas station will whisper “respect.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3765\" data-end=\"3894\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3767\" data-end=\"3894\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3767\" data-end=\"3807\"\u003eYou’ll confuse and delight everyone.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"3807\" data-end=\"3810\"\u003e99% of people don’t know what a longhorn fish is. 1% are now your best friends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3896\" data-end=\"4093\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3898\" data-end=\"4093\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3898\" data-end=\"3950\"\u003eYou’re supporting a tiny biz, not some megacorp.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"3950\" data-end=\"3953\"\u003eThis sticker isn’t mass-produced by robots. It’s designed by two weirdos with a vinyl cutter, a dream, and an unhealthy knowledge of fish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"4095\" data-end=\"4098\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"4100\" data-end=\"4165\" class=\"\"\u003e🧽 Installation Tips (For Geniuses and Chaos Gremlins Alike)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4167\" data-end=\"4189\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"4167\" data-end=\"4187\"\u003eSticker Version:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"4190\" data-end=\"4448\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4190\" data-end=\"4244\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4193\" data-end=\"4244\" class=\"\"\u003eClean surface with alcohol or something non-oily.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4245\" data-end=\"4277\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4248\" data-end=\"4277\" class=\"\"\u003ePeel backing like a banana.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4278\" data-end=\"4348\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4281\" data-end=\"4348\" class=\"\"\u003eApply with confidence. Rub it like you're trying to start a fire.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4349\" data-end=\"4448\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4352\" data-end=\"4448\" class=\"\"\u003eAvoid freezing temperatures unless you want the sticker to yeet itself off your car overnight.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4450\" data-end=\"4471\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"4450\" data-end=\"4469\"\u003eMagnet Version:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"4472\" data-end=\"4753\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4472\" data-end=\"4515\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4475\" data-end=\"4515\" class=\"\"\u003eStick on a flat, clean, metal surface.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4516\" data-end=\"4588\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4519\" data-end=\"4588\" class=\"\"\u003eAvoid weird curves or sharp angles unless you enjoy disappointment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4589\" data-end=\"4683\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4592\" data-end=\"4683\" class=\"\"\u003eIf bubbles appear, don’t panic—sun and time will flatten them like a middle school crush.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"4684\" data-end=\"4753\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4687\" data-end=\"4753\" class=\"\"\u003eRemove and wipe the surface every few weeks to avoid dirt rings.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"4755\" data-end=\"4758\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"4760\" data-end=\"4789\" class=\"\"\u003e🐟 FAQ – Cow Fish Edition\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4791\" data-end=\"4920\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"4791\" data-end=\"4826\"\u003eQ: Is this really weatherproof?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"4826\" data-end=\"4829\"\u003eA: Hell yes. It's built to survive rain, sun, snow, and the occasional car wash freakout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4922\" data-end=\"5107\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"4922\" data-end=\"4964\"\u003eQ: Will the magnet stick to my bumper?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"4964\" data-end=\"4967\"\u003eA: Depends. Most modern bumpers are plastic. Check your trunk, hatch, or side panels. If you’re unsure, test with any basic fridge magnet.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5109\" data-end=\"5234\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"5109\" data-end=\"5171\"\u003eQ: Is this bumper sticker available in other sizes?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"5171\" data-end=\"5174\"\u003eA: Not yet, but yell at us on Instagram and we might cave.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5236\" data-end=\"5352\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"5236\" data-end=\"5265\"\u003eQ: Why a cowfish, though?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"5265\" data-end=\"5268\"\u003eA: Because it’s hilarious. Because it’s underrated. Because it has horns. Why not?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5354\" data-end=\"5439\" class=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"5354\" data-end=\"5383\"\u003eQ: Do you ship worldwide?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"5383\" data-end=\"5386\"\u003eA: Yep. Our cowfish energy is not bound by borders.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"5441\" data-end=\"5444\" class=\"\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"5446\" data-end=\"5494\" class=\"\"\u003e💥 Final Thoughts – Brake Loud, Brake Proud\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5496\" data-end=\"5694\" class=\"\"\u003eThis isn’t just a bumper sticker. It’s a statement. A warning. A siren call to all other aquatic freaks out there. The \u003cstrong data-start=\"5615\" data-end=\"5635\"\u003elonghorn cowfish\u003c\/strong\u003e deserves recognition, and your car deserves personality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5696\" data-end=\"5810\" class=\"\"\u003eSo go ahead. Be bold. Be weird. Be the person who slams the brakes in front of SeaWorld just to yell “THAT ONE!”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"5812\" data-end=\"5931\" class=\"\"\u003eSlap this sucker on your ride and show the world you brake for greatness.\u003cbr data-start=\"5885\" data-end=\"5888\"\u003eAnd longhorn cowfish. Mostly the cowfish.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca title=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/www.frogmustardstickers.com\/collections\/all\" target=\"_self\"\u003eShop All\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca title=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/frogmustardstickers\" target=\"_self\"\u003eFollow us on Instagram\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Frog Mustard Stickers","offers":[{"title":"Sticker","offer_id":53071709602081,"sku":"Cowfish Sticker","price":10.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard Magnet","offer_id":53071709634849,"sku":"Cowfish Magnet","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Extra Thick Magnet","offer_id":53071709667617,"sku":"sku-51535804301591","price":16.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0694\/7186\/3073\/files\/i-brake-for-longhorn-cowfish-8091112.jpg?v=1784868133","url":"https:\/\/shaketeaus.com\/products\/i-brake-for-longhorn-cowfish","provider":"Shaketea","version":"1.0","type":"link"}