{"product_id":"on-my-way-to-jury-duty-hes-guilty-i-already-decided","title":"On My Way To Jury Duty (He's Guilty - I Already Decided)","description":"\u003ch1 data-start=\"586\" data-end=\"668\"\u003eOn My Way To Jury Guilt – He’s Guilty I Already Decided – Funny Bumper Sticker\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"670\" data-end=\"715\"\u003eCivic Duty? Nah. Pre-Meditated Judgment.\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"717\" data-end=\"875\"\u003eForget “innocent until proven guilty”—your mind’s made up, your car’s in drive, and your \u003cstrong data-start=\"806\" data-end=\"824\"\u003ebumper sticker\u003c\/strong\u003e just told the whole freeway how this trial ends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"877\" data-end=\"1118\"\u003eThis is not legal advice. This is a rolling confession. A threat to due process. An aggressive act of vehicular honesty. At 8.5 inches wide and 2.5 inches tall, this \u003cstrong data-start=\"1043\" data-end=\"1067\"\u003efunny bumper sticker\u003c\/strong\u003e is designed to turn heads and terrify attorneys.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1120\" data-end=\"1319\"\u003eWhether you're serving on an actual jury or just deeply opinionated on things you barely read about, this sticker lets people know you don’t wait for opening arguments—you go straight to the verdict.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1321\" data-end=\"1324\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1326\" data-end=\"1352\"\u003eWhat Is “Jury Guilt”?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1354\" data-end=\"1548\"\u003eJury guilt is a state of mind. It’s what happens when you get that summons in the mail and immediately start practicing your stare of disapproval. It’s civic engagement meets pure, uncut bias.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1550\" data-end=\"1753\"\u003eThis bumper sticker declares to the world that you’ve already made up your mind—and now you’re heading into that courthouse with the energy of a judge, executioner, and chaos gremlin all rolled into one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1755\" data-end=\"1758\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1760\" data-end=\"1817\"\u003eWhy This Bumper Sticker Slaps (and Possibly Offends)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1819\" data-end=\"2100\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1819\" data-end=\"1868\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1821\" data-end=\"1868\"\u003eIt’s painfully funny and legally questionable\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1869\" data-end=\"1918\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1871\" data-end=\"1918\"\u003eIt confuses traffic and terrifies prosecutors\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1919\" data-end=\"1978\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1921\" data-end=\"1978\"\u003eIt says “I don’t trust the system, but I am the system”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1979\" data-end=\"2055\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1981\" data-end=\"2055\"\u003eIt’s perfect for people who love courtroom drama and unearned confidence\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2056\" data-end=\"2100\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2058\" data-end=\"2100\"\u003eIt’s an instant red flag. In a good way.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2102\" data-end=\"2211\"\u003eStick it on your bumper, briefcase, water bottle, or anywhere judgment needs to be delivered without warning.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2213\" data-end=\"2216\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2218\" data-end=\"2238\"\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2240\" data-end=\"2535\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2240\" data-end=\"2265\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2242\" data-end=\"2265\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2242\" data-end=\"2251\"\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e 8.5\" x 2.5\"\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2266\" data-end=\"2313\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2268\" data-end=\"2313\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2268\" data-end=\"2281\"\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/strong\u003e Weatherproof commercial vinyl\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2314\" data-end=\"2340\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2316\" data-end=\"2340\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2316\" data-end=\"2327\"\u003eFinish:\u003c\/strong\u003e Semi-gloss\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2341\" data-end=\"2413\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2343\" data-end=\"2413\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2343\" data-end=\"2362\"\u003eSticker Option:\u003c\/strong\u003e Permanent. For people who stand by their ruling.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2414\" data-end=\"2465\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2416\" data-end=\"2465\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2416\" data-end=\"2443\"\u003eMagnet Option (20 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e Reusable, removable\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2466\" data-end=\"2535\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2468\" data-end=\"2535\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2468\" data-end=\"2496\"\u003eMagnet Upgrade (30 mil):\u003c\/strong\u003e Frost-proof for cold-hearted justice\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2537\" data-end=\"2642\"\u003eProudly printed by a small business known for mixing high-quality print with low-quality impulse control.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2644\" data-end=\"2647\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2649\" data-end=\"2701\"\u003eSticker vs Magnet – What Kind of Juror Are You?\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2703\" data-end=\"2724\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2703\" data-end=\"2722\"\u003eSticker Version\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2725\" data-end=\"2789\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2725\" data-end=\"2738\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2727\" data-end=\"2738\"\u003ePermanent\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2739\" data-end=\"2789\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2741\" data-end=\"2789\"\u003eFor people who never change their minds. Ever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2791\" data-end=\"2820\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2791\" data-end=\"2818\"\u003eMagnet Version (20 mil)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2821\" data-end=\"2887\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2821\" data-end=\"2833\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2823\" data-end=\"2833\"\u003eFlexible\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2834\" data-end=\"2887\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2836\" data-end=\"2887\"\u003ePerfect for leased cars and emotional instability\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2889\" data-end=\"2918\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2889\" data-end=\"2916\"\u003eMagnet Upgrade (30 mil)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2919\" data-end=\"3005\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2919\" data-end=\"2933\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2921\" data-end=\"2933\"\u003eHeavy-duty\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2934\" data-end=\"3005\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2936\" data-end=\"3005\"\u003eIdeal for court parking lots in winter or morally cold environments\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3007\" data-end=\"3097\"\u003eMost modern car bumpers are plastic. Test with a fridge magnet first. No verdict required.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3099\" data-end=\"3102\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3104\" data-end=\"3126\"\u003eWhere To Stick It\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3128\" data-end=\"3341\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3128\" data-end=\"3140\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3130\" data-end=\"3140\"\u003eYour car\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3141\" data-end=\"3156\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3143\" data-end=\"3156\"\u003eYour laptop\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3157\" data-end=\"3231\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3159\" data-end=\"3231\"\u003eYour lunchbox (especially if you eat it alone in the courthouse lobby)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3232\" data-end=\"3277\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3234\" data-end=\"3277\"\u003eYour fridge, next to other cold decisions\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3278\" data-end=\"3341\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3280\" data-end=\"3341\"\u003eThe door of your neighbor who always plays devil’s advocate\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3343\" data-end=\"3346\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3348\" data-end=\"3377\"\u003eApplication Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3379\" data-end=\"3393\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3379\" data-end=\"3391\"\u003eSticker:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"3394\" data-end=\"3536\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3394\" data-end=\"3412\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3397\" data-end=\"3412\"\u003eClean surface\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3413\" data-end=\"3475\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3416\" data-end=\"3475\"\u003ePeel and apply with the confidence of a hung jury foreman\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3476\" data-end=\"3509\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3479\" data-end=\"3509\"\u003ePress firmly from end to end\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3510\" data-end=\"3536\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3513\" data-end=\"3536\"\u003eLet cure for 24 hours\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3538\" data-end=\"3551\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3538\" data-end=\"3549\"\u003eMagnet:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"3552\" data-end=\"3642\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3552\" data-end=\"3586\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3555\" data-end=\"3586\"\u003eClean and dry a metal surface\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3587\" data-end=\"3599\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3590\" data-end=\"3599\"\u003eSlap on\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3600\" data-end=\"3642\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3603\" data-end=\"3642\"\u003eRemove occasionally and clean beneath\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3644\" data-end=\"3647\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3649\" data-end=\"3677\"\u003eFAQ – Jury Bias Edition\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3679\" data-end=\"3719\"\u003eIs this bumper sticker waterproof?\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3720\" data-end=\"3801\"\u003eYes. Just like your opinions, it won’t change in the face of evidence or weather.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3803\" data-end=\"3852\"\u003eWill this make me ineligible for jury duty?\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3853\" data-end=\"3944\"\u003eLegally? No. Spiritually? Maybe. Either way, wear it proudly to the courthouse parking lot.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3946\" data-end=\"3969\"\u003eIs this giftable?\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3970\" data-end=\"4091\"\u003eAbsolutely. Ideal for law students, exes, true crime addicts, and people who say “I don’t need the facts—I’ve got vibes.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"4093\" data-end=\"4096\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"4098\" data-end=\"4115\"\u003eFinal Ruling\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4117\" data-end=\"4262\"\u003eThis \u003cstrong data-start=\"4122\" data-end=\"4146\"\u003efunny bumper sticker\u003c\/strong\u003e isn’t just a joke. It’s a declaration of deeply biased civic pride. It’s the road version of “I know what I saw.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4264\" data-end=\"4556\"\u003eIf you’ve ever listened to one podcast and immediately become a judge, this is for you.\u003cbr data-start=\"4351\" data-end=\"4354\"\u003eIf you’ve ever been excused from jury duty for “body language,” this is for you.\u003cbr data-start=\"4434\" data-end=\"4437\"\u003eIf you're the kind of person who makes snap decisions and then yells about them—\u003cstrong data-start=\"4517\" data-end=\"4554\"\u003eyou’ve found your bumper sticker.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4558\" data-end=\"4613\"\u003eBuy it. Stick it.\u003cbr data-start=\"4575\" data-end=\"4578\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"4578\" data-end=\"4611\"\u003eGuilty. No further questions.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🚨 WARNING: These bumper stickers and magnets may cause laughing fits in traffic. 🚨\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Frog Mustard — home of unhinged, weatherproof, high-quality chaos for your car. Est. 2023. Over 50,000 sold, 7,000+ five-star reviews, featured in the New York Times, and stocked in 70+ retail stores (including Zumiez). You're in weird company.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🐸 PRODUCT INFO:\u003cbr\u003e-Rectangular designs are approx. 8.5 x 2.5 inches\u003cbr\u003e-Die-cuts are typically 3–4 inches\u003cbr\u003e-Handmade! Sizing may vary slightly. Mockup images are not to scale.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💪 MATERIAL:\u003cbr\u003e-Premium all-weather vinyl\u003cbr\u003e-Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-proof, car wash safe\u003cbr\u003e-Apocalypse-resistant\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🧲 MAGNETS:\u003cbr\u003e-Standard magnets are 20 mil thick.\u003cbr\u003e-Upgrade to 30 mil on our site — recommended for cold climates or aggressive winds.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🧼 STICKER APPLICATION:\u003cbr\u003e-Clean surface with water (avoid detergent or alcohol - but if you must use it - make sure it is all removed prior to applying).\u003cbr\u003e-Dry fully. Apply to smooth, glossy, non-textured areas.\u003cbr\u003e-Press from center out to avoid bubbles.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e⚠️ MAGNET APPLICATION:\u003cbr\u003e-Only sticks to metal — bumpers on newer cars are often plastic.\u003cbr\u003e-Air bubbles? Normal. Heat helps flatten them.\u003cbr\u003e-Remove before car washes or extreme weather conditions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❗ DISCLAIMERS:\u003cbr\u003e-We don’t offer refunds for application to textured\/plastic\/dirty surfaces.\u003cbr\u003e-Minor variations in cut\/print are normal — these are handmade.\u003cbr\u003e-These are glossy\/smooth surface, road, and car tested. You assume the risk if you apply to a weird surface.\u003cbr\u003e-If your order arrives damaged, just message us — we’ll make it right.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e📦 SHIPPING:\u003cbr\u003e-Ships in 1–3 business days from Washington\u003cbr\u003e-We ship worldwide 🌍\u003cbr\u003e-Free shipping available. Note that free third-party shipping is only trackable via Etsy or Pitney Bowes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🎁 ALSO FROM FROG MUSTARD:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMonthly Sticker Subscriptions at frogmustardstickers.com\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSubmit a design to our monthly Frog Army Sticker Stars contest and win a free sticker or magnet!\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFollow @frogmustardstickers for memes, giveaways, and general chaos\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWHY FROG MUSTARD?\u003cbr\u003eBecause we are the best.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eQuestions? hello@frogmustardstickers.com\u003cbr\u003e🛒 frogmustardstickers.com\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🧷 TAGS: funny bumper sticker, weird car magnet, unhinged vinyl decal, frog mustard stickers, waterproof magnet\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca title=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/www.frogmustardstickers.com\/collections\/all\" target=\"_self\"\u003eShop All\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca title=\"\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/frogmustardstickers\" target=\"_self\"\u003eFollow us on Instagram\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Frog Mustard Stickers","offers":[{"title":"Sticker","offer_id":53071707078945,"sku":"Jury Duty Sticker","price":10.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard Magnet","offer_id":53071707111713,"sku":"Jury Duty Magnet","price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Extra Thick Magnet","offer_id":53071707144481,"sku":"sku-51535804530967","price":16.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0694\/7186\/3073\/files\/on-my-way-to-jury-duty-hes-guilty-i-already-decided-1949055.jpg?v=1784868110","url":"https:\/\/shaketeaus.com\/products\/on-my-way-to-jury-duty-hes-guilty-i-already-decided","provider":"Shaketea","version":"1.0","type":"link"}